How An Insurance Man Makes His Wife Happy

Posted on January 14, 2012 by Brett

My wife found this recipe for spinach and feta quesadillas yesterday. I’m guessing she Pinned it (I will admit that Pinterest thing looks cool, but I’ll leave that to her while she leaves Twitter to me).

In the fridge, we had some spinach and feta and tortillas so it made solid sense to cook some up.

As I was whipping up dinner, I thought of some of my favorite home cook kitchen hacks. I’m not a fancy chef, but I got some skills. If you’re challenged around the kitchen, read on. I think I have a couple things I can teach you.

Trust me, my cooking is one of my chief methods for keeping my lady happy.

Brett’s Top 6 Tips for Developing Deliciousness:

1. Onion, Bell Pepper, and Garlic Are Your Friends: If we have all three fresh in the fridge, our spaghetti sauce, chili, Mexican, or Chinese is instantly better. Slice, dice, and saute as a base for any number of dishes.

2. Learn Families of Herbs & Spices: Admittedly, my family gets in a rut. But we like our ruts: We have a Mexi-rut and an Italia-rut.

For our Mexican, we make sure to toss in some cumin, cilantro (preferably fresh, but we also have dried), chili pepper, paprika, and cayenne.

For our Italian, we always have some oregano, parsley, basil, garlic, and red pepper flakes.

If you like Greek, Chinese, Indian, or some other ethnic foods, take note of what comes up in the recipes you like. You’ll be able to be more creative with what you have in the refrigerator if you can shade your foods in the direction that you like.

3. Quesadillas for Fun Fridge-Emptying Options:  You can, in the words of Rob Lowe’s Parks & Rec character, literally make a quesadilla out of anything. It’s a great option for chicken, spinach, onion, peppers, broccoli, and nearly any kind of cheese.

4. Flatbreads + Sauce + Cheese = Pizza: Our favorite method of making personal pizza is to take a flatbread, brush with olive oil, spread with tomato sauce (we’ll blend up our own, but we aren’t too good for the jar), top with whatever we have in the fridge (we’ve even used sauteed sandwich meat ham), cover with cheese and pop on the grill outside or the oven inside. Great for Friday or Saturday movie nights.

5. Follow Recipes but Learn Principles: This relates to the herb/spice family item above, but it also includes cooking methods and cooking times, temps, and even chemistry. As you follow recipes over time, pay attention to why certain ingredients are used or how different flavors go together.  My wife, the baker and ardent recipe follower, is even starting to riff on the muffins and cakes she creates.

6. Experiment: The spinach feta quesadilla recipe called for Greek ingredients but we didn’t have the stuff they suggested. I opted for my Mexican options, added some sauteed garlic, onion, and green pepper. But on a whim, I sprinkled in some cinnamon. It was a very light and pleasing added dimension.

Resources

If you’re interested in learning principles and cooking hacks, not just recipes, I recommend finding 10 Dollar Dinners with Melissa d’Arabian, America’s Test Kitchen, and old episodes of Good Eats on TV.

I’ve mentioned her blog before, but if you’re interested in some simple and healthy options, check out Alison Lewis at Ingredientsinc.net. Follow her on Twitter and you’ll discover more food-related resources.

Happy Eating! If you have some suggestions that work for you, drop them in the comments.

Posted in Food & Drink | Tagged , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Depth, Trim, Consistent

Posted on January 11, 2012 by Brett

Mr. Chris Brogan, social media and online marketing guru, genius, superstar (not sure his official title), has a practice of selecting three words each year as thematic underpinnings for his world. He filters his projects, goals, and so on through his three words.

He recently issued the challenge–and set the cliffhanger for his 1/1/12 release–to his readers to develop their own ‘three words.’  No longer a cliffhanger (I started the draft for this post somewhere near Christmas).

Challenge accepted, Trust Agent.

I’ve wrestled with my three words. I’ve tried to conform them into the same part of speech (I ended with a noun, verb, and adjective). I’ve thought about where I’ve been this year and where I’m heading. I know last year focused on focus. I attempted to be more disciplined.

Honestly, I’m worn out with it all. I still agree with the ideas I’ve encouraged in this blog around focusing on single, small, consistent changes, but I’m worn out with the words ‘focus’ and ‘simplify.’

What will be important to me in 2012? If not ‘focus’, then what?

I toyed with a few lists. Lists that featured the same first letter, lists that were action-filled verbs, leasts featuring colorful adjectives. In the end I settled on these three: Depth, Trim, Consistent.

Depth: The Noun

I hope everything I do this year contributes to greater depth in my world: personally, spiritually, relationally, and professionally.

It’s easy to go a mile wide and an inch deep, to give a little to a lot of people, places, or things.  In 2012 I believe that being more selective with my projects, both personally and professionally, will allow me to give more completely to them.

Mostly, I want this to apply to my family and friends.

Trim: The Verb

This word is the most closely related to my ‘one word’ from 2011: Simplicity.

I want to trim anything that needs it:

  • My waistline
  • My budget
  • My clutter
  • The good that gets in the way of the best
  • My commitment

Part of me wants to use ‘chop’, but I don’t like the violent connotation. I like trim. It’s active, yet surgical. It’s precise. It’s selective. It implies purpose, not just random hacking.

Mostly, this word applies to lifestyle, home, finances, health

Consistent: The Adjective

It’s boring to be called ‘consistent,’ but I’ll take it. If, at the end of this year, I can say I was consistent around positive habits and growth, then I would consider that a win.

My work  (mostly sales) depends on consistently doing things that don’t immediately produce results.  Calls, letters, emails, studying my product  don’t always translate into immediate revenue. But over time, traction is gained and flow is achieved.

Consistent isn’t sexy, but it works. I don’t want to lose 30 lbs by February, but if I drop a pound every two weeks throughout the year, I would have tossed a good chunk of fat out the window. I’m good with that. I think anybody would be happy with a 25 lb net loss.

Consistent applies to my habits. I want to select few, but I want to nail them.

With that, I hereby end the obligatory blogger’s requirement of spouting out their annual plans.

Thanks for reading. Enjoy your day.

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My One Word: From Zen to Vim

Posted on January 4, 2012 by Brett

Although I said I wasn’t going to narrate my 2012 planning process via this blog, I thought it helpful to give examples of the 3 organizational principles I touted a couple days ago.

Today, I’ll talk about my ‘One Word’. In later posts, I’ll discuss my ‘Three Words’ and then my Life Plan.

My Word for 2011: Simplicity

By way of review, my word for 2011 was Simplicity. I chewed up as many minimalist and simplicity blogs as I could. I bought a bunch of ebooks (when I could get them all for a cheap price). I considered going one car or no car. I thought about removing all wall art and sweeping all tchotchkes off of my shells.

I amused myself with how many people made it their life’s aim to own fewer than 100 items (including plates, underwear, and books).

But in the end, I knew that wasn’t the point of selecting that word.

What I Learned…

You can expend a lot of energy attempting to simplify. While I realized I needed to (and still need to) declutter physically, mentally, and spiritually, simplicity (to me) isn’t ultimately about what you remove.

It’s about zeroing in on what’s important.

That’s what I learned:

  • When I was doing something, I needed to do it alone.
  • When I was with someone, I needed to be with him or her.
  • When I was thinking about something, I needed to clear my head and think about it.
  • If there is a distraction to any of these things, I needed to learn to put it aside.

In the process, I was able to declutter and minimize a bit. The biggest declutter project: ditching my need to have 38 improvement projects on tap simultaneously. Ultimately, it’s  helpful to consider only a few changes a year, maybe even fake yourself into only one change. If that change happens, then move on to another.

Is it really helpful to multi-task change?

My Word For 2012: Energy

For 2012, I’ve decided I’ve had it with simplicity, minimalism, and margin. I’m still working in those areas, but I’m weary of droning on about it.

This year, I want to capitalize on my youth. As a new minted man in his 40s, I realize I’m in the prime of my life. Consequently, my word is Energy.

No more will I focus on what to get rid of or minimize. I’m going to pick something and go after it.

For my kids: I realize that my kids don’t just want efficient moms and dads. They want energetic parentals. They want to go and do.  My daughter’s teacher last year was the perfect example. Ms. A was full of zeal and energy and my daughter learned so, so much. Delivery is important. When I’m excited, they get excited.

For my work (home, biz, and writing): Seth Godin’s imperative to ‘ship’, as in send out, deliver, quit perfecting and print, stop mulling and pick up the phone and dial, etc. has been a great message to me. That speaks to creating energy and forward motion. No waiting.

For my health: Focusing on ‘Energy’ relates to my health. While 40 is youthful, it’s also a dividing line. I can tell that the habits now will affect my world at 75. I want to feel lighter and be sharp. I want to encourage motion. Healthful food, rest, soccer balls, tennis racquets. Let’s do this thing.

There you have it: Energy. I don’t want to be manic or merely caffienated, just ready to go.

What is your One Word for 2012? (Leave a comment below and then click on the link and participate)

(Next Post: My Brogian 3 Words)

Posted in Personal Growth | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

3 Ways to Organize Your World in 2012

Posted on January 2, 2012 by Brett

I didn’t accomplish everything I wanted to last year. But I’m pretty sure I got much further because I actually wrote things out before the year started.

I went through an elaborate process of reviewing 2010 and planning for 2011. I wrote a few blog posts about it.  This year, I’m going to tone it down a bit.

I still think it’s important to prep for the year. Before you shush me because of the bad rap New Year’s resolutions get, stick with me. My reasons for planning a new year:

  • It’s a natural point to reflect and look forward. 
  • It’s like a new day, you can say good-bye to yesterday, and lace up the boots to get it done for the new one. 2012 hasn’t happened to you yet… you can happen to it. 
  • Most of us have a little time to do it with all the holidays and such and the lull of getting back into the swing the first few days of the year. 

Here are three helpful practices, two of which keep it very, very simple. Pick one, pick ‘em all:

1. One Word:  Last year, I discovered Alece Ronzino’s practice of selecting a one word theme for the upcoming year. My word for 2011 was Focus. To me, focus was about learning to simplify (focusing on only doing the most important things) and being present (focusing on who I was with and what I was doing at any particular time. It helped to have one word in the back of my brain all year.

This year, my word is Energy. I don’t want frenetic or manic energy. I want passionate pursuit of anything that I do. If it’s worth doing, it deserves my high energy effort. Energy is not only how I want to approach things. It’s also what I want more of. If I’m taking care of my mind, heart, and body, then I’ll have less chance to fall into the doldrums.

I suggest you go over to either oneword365.com or gritandglory.com and commit to one word.

2. Three Words:  Marketing maniac Chris Brogan selects three words each year as guiding principles behind his efforts. It still keeps the whole new year goal creation process simple. Every goal, project, habit has to be filtered through these major themes.

In my world, I’ve chosen depth, trim, and consistency. I have a blog draft on these, so I won’t go into too much detail. The summary:

  • I want relationships to run deep.
  • I want to trim whatever fat, real or metaphorical, that’s in my life.
  • I want to be diligent, consistent, and bullheaded in doing the important things, whether it’s jogging, spending time in Scripture, taking my wife on dates, or flossing.

I want to pursue these things and any sub-goals with Energy.

3. Life Plan:  If you’ve not taken time to go through life planning exercise, I recommend it. Michael Hyatt has a free ebook that will guide you through the process. I took a day and a half last week to walk through it. It was eye-opening to say the least. (I finished the main piece in about 4-5 hours of focused work).

The process helped me with three things:

  • Focused me on the relationships that are important.
  • Helped me to balance (under the over-arching relationship with God) family, business, health.
  • Clarified where I am and my preferred future while providing a review process.

Admittedly, it’s a little more complex than the first two items, but it’s more of a personal manifesto to have on hand and to develop as you go along. It will change as life changes.

A Point to Remember…

Regardless of our methods of new year preparation, we do not control everything that happens. That’s the beauty of the one or three words: when things happen to us, how will we respond?

Questions (leave a comment below):

  • How do you plan for your new year?
  • If you had to select one word, what would it be?
  • What would your three words be?
  • Have you attempted a life plan? How was it? If you go download the book, I’d love to hear your thoughts.

 

 

 

Posted in Miscellaneous, Personal Growth | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Thank You

Posted on December 31, 2011 by Brett

Depending on when you read this, the year is just ending or just beginning (or it’s some other random time in the future that you might be rummaging through this blog).

I’m writing this around 6:3o on New Year’s Eve. I have steaks marinating and little chitlins running around the house jacked up on mac and cheese. My wife just had her first opportunity for a shower.

It’s been a rough day. The little ones struggled with their listening skills. My dad and I worked all day putting in a storm door that never quite fit right. So while we were installing, uninstalling, and reinstalling the storm door, I heard the shrieks of dismay as timeouts were being meted out by my soldier of a wife.

That’s how my year is ending. I don’t recall exactly, but minus the storm door, I have a feeling that is how it ended last year, also.

I know it sounds like I am, but I’m not at all complaining. Sure, I’d love eternally cherubic children and I’d love it if everything I bought from Home Depot worked without my dad using his ‘make-it-work’ skills.

But in the end, I’m closing out the year as a happy man. I have a good wife. I have healthy children. I have a good job that, I think, is on the verge of getting better. I have a group of guys that I get together with every Friday morning at 6:30 that challenge and encourage me.

I’ve not gained all that much weight this year (special thanks to a recent end-of-year tummy virus). I’ve read more good books and listened to more good content than I think I’ve ever piled into one year (if you’re curious what some of the good stuff is, just leave a comment).

I’ve grown this year, and I really couldn’t ask for much more.

Finally, if you’re reading this, more than likely you’re a friend or a family member or a new friend through social media. If so, I know you’ve all been sources of growth and encouragement to me this year. Even knowing that a couple folks read these things is an encouragement.

For these things, I thank you all.

I pray you have a wonderful 2o12. Whether you set goals or have general ideas of where you want to be or if you’re in a particularly rough or particularly great place in life right now, I pray that your life changes, somehow, for the better this upcoming 365.

With that, I’m tired. I have to fire up the grill. I’d love to set up some internal links on this blog so you can see some old blog posts about some of the folks I referenced above, but quite honestly, you don’t have time to read all that stuff. You have family or friends to hang with.

Happy New Year, Love Me.

Posted in Milestones, Miscellaneous | Tagged , , , | 5 Comments

We All Think We’re Photographers. but…

Posted on December 27, 2011 by Brett

These days, give a person an iPhone and Instagram and he thinks he’s the second coming of Annie Leibovitz or Ansel Adams (Guilty).

Then you run into someone who can do wonders with a camera.

I’d like to give a shout out to two of these people. If you happen to live either (a) in the Atlanta/North Georgia area or (b) down near Winter Haven/Orlando, etc. in Florida then take a couple notes or keep their web links close by.

Kimberly Herbert Photography

First, Kimberly Herbert of Kimberly Herbert Photography did an amazing job, capturing the personalities of my sons, daughter, and wife. I was blown away with these pictures. Obviously, I believe my kids and wife are empiracally gorgeous, the overall feel and look of these pictures captured more than their cuteness.

I actually got teary-eyed when I got these pictures as a surprise for Christmas. You’ll notice that one of the pictures from this session now graces this blog as my new header. The photo below now makes my office more awesome.

My Wife & Kids, courtesy of www.kimberlyherbertphotography.com

Please go check out her website.

Andy Glogower, innerglowphoto.com

Second is my cousin Andy Glogower. He was nice enough to provide the main photo for my Christmas post about Mary.

I particularly like his performance photos. Of course, it’s also fun to see my extended family captured so beautifully throughout Facebook due to Andy’s work.

I’ve not warned Andy about this post, so I hope it’s okay to include a couple of jpgs… one a collage of me and my boys back when they were just turning one…

…and another of a  sunrise over a lake near his house.

Sunrise over Lake Hamilton, Copyright Andy Glogower

I encourage you to look him up on his website to see more galleries and contact him if you’re in the central-ish Florida area.

Who Does Good Work?

One more note.  I have not discussed this post with either Kimberly Herbert or Andy Glogower, so I have nothing to gain from this (outside of the Amazon links for Annie Leibovitz and Ansel Adams, so I can make a few pennies if you buy something there).

I encourage you to tell folks in your circles (Google+, Facebook, Twitter, or the normal, traditional ones) about people who do good work for you.

Whether it’s a shoe repair shop, a restaurant, a homebuilder or a photographer, pass along the recommendation. First, you’re helping out the business owner that did good work for you. Second, you’re helping out your network who might appreciate knowing about a trusted resource.

Have you had a top notch experience recently? Where did you sing the praises?

 

Posted in Miscellaneous | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Mary: A Mom Being a Mom

Posted on December 23, 2011 by Brett

I can’t get this song out of my head this Christmas (video and lyrics below). When I first heard it, I was struck that despite the angelic dreams and visions enjoyed by Mary and Joseph, the actual birth was stark, unromantic, and obscure.

Courtesy of Andy Glogower www.innerglowphoto.com

If I were Joseph, I would have felt like a failure to only provide a stable. If I were Mary, I would have been doubting any dream or vision I might have had. This baby couldn’t be who that angel told her it was.

But even if the baby was destined to be a simple carpenter’s apprentice or a farmer or a merchant, Mary would have gladly gone through the discomfort of a stable birth. Even if Jesus was just another baby.

That’s how good moms do things. A baby doesn’t have to be a Savior to be worth it. Mary was a mom being a mom. A mom finding a place to welcome her child into the world the best that she could given the circumstances.

Though we appreciate Mary and talk about how difficult it had to be as a pregnant teen with rumors flying, we forget that she was also just a woman expecting her first child. She wasn’t a robotic automaton on a mission from God. She was a human being experiencing the most powerful of human experiences.

It just so happens that her boy was born with a major mission and, while He was hers, He wasn’t hers at all. Despite the fact she knew He wasn’t technically hers, I have a feeling she loved Him every bit as much as she did James, Jesus’ half-brother (and any of her other kids).

And how proud she had to have been of both of them. I doubt even the knowledge that her son was her Savior stifled her pride and her pain in who Jesus was and what He would have to endure.

Merry Christmas to all you moms…. because of you the world is changed on a daily basis.  Thank you for giving your best to the little ones given to you.

It was not a silent night
There was blood on the ground
You could hear a woman cry
In the alleyways that night
On the streets of David’s town

And the stable was not clean
And the cobblestones were cold
And little Mary full of grace
With the tears upon her face
Had no mother’s hand to hold

It was a labor of pain
It was a cold sky above
But for the girl on the ground in the dark
With every beat of her beautiful heart
It was a labor of love

Noble Joseph at her side
Callused hands and weary eyes
There were no midwives to be found
In the streets of David’s town
In the middle of the night

So he held her and he prayed
Shafts of moonlight on his face
But the baby in her womb
He was the maker of the moon
He was the Author of the faith
That could make the mountains move

It was a labor of pain
It was a cold sky above
But for the girl on the ground in the dark
With every beat of her beautiful heart
It was a labor of love

For little Mary full of grace
With the tears upon her face
It was a labor of love

–Andrew Peterson, Labor of Love

From the album: Behold the Lamb of God

Merry Christmas!

Posted in Faith | Tagged , , , , | 11 Comments

I’m Santa Now

Posted on December 20, 2011 by Brett

This is a repost from 12/24/10. I thought it’d be fun to repost this year. Hope you’re having a Merry Christmas!

And I’m tired. For the record, my wife did most of the gift purchasing and wrapping. I just cleaned some of the house and ate Santa’s cookies and had a beverage or two.

This is the first year that our daughter (now 3 1/2) is excited about Christmas and Santa. She’s also discussed the Bethlehem birth of Baby Jesus and has peppered us with theological queries such as ‘How is Jesus God’?

The Case for Santa

Watching my children enjoy the fun and wonder surrounding the world of Santa made me nostalgic. I still remember moments as a child–little things that confirmed the existence of the jolly old elf.

Exhibit 1: For instance, he placed presents under the tree. They even had tags ‘To Brett, From Santa.’

Exhibit 2: He also ate the cookies prepared for him. He even left thank you notes.  So what if his handwriting was eerily similar to my dad’s.

Exhibit 3: The red blinking lights way, way, way high in the sky that we’d see on the way home from a candlelight service were his sleigh. I truly expected that sometimes he’d come early–after all if that was his sleigh, he was in the area.

In the end, the case was circumstantial at best, but the biggest part was my own imagination and hope. The evidence was almost irrelevant. I mean, why did he wrap presents for my friends, but for me he left them unwrapped? All my large presents happened to be from Santa. It had nothing to do with the difficulty of concocting a wrapping plan for a big wheel.

I might have even believed later than the average kid. That’s cool. I’m proud of that now. And despite my Christian faith, I’m down with a healthy Santa belief. The worst it can do is encourage materialism. That’s our fault regardless. The benefit is an outlet for imagination, wonder, and fun.

So, tonight my wife and I left a few presents unwrapped. Thanks Santa! We had a few sugar cookies and left a thank you note. We crumbed up a few pretzel sticks because, as we told our daughter, reindeer love pretzels.

I’m Santa now, and I owe it to my kids to make it fun. I know most importantly to teach them this is the celebration of Jesus’ birth, that at a certain point in time, God infiltrated earth, became flesh, and walked among us.  My parents were able to do both, so I’ll give it a shot.

With that, it’s 12:12 and I should probably hit the sack because 6:30 will come quickly, and I’ll have to wax eloquent about how Santa got into the house despite the plywood we have over our fireplace (due to my 2 yr old boys’ tendency to want to climb into it).

Merry Christmas and I pray you enjoy your day with your family and friends.

 

Posted in Faith, Family | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Not Only Dogs Get ‘Sent to the Farm’

Posted on December 19, 2011 by Brett

Do you remember the last thing you gave up because you decided you had to grow up?

Last week we gave our boys’ night-time pacifiers away to another baby–you know, like when you have to send an elder dog ‘to the great farm family’. We had Jake and Sam package them up and take them down to the mailbox to send off to a little newborn who needed the bits of plastic comfort a little more.

My boys are just over 3 and used them only at night, but nonetheless, they were as addicted to them as a semi-smoker is to the after dinner cigarette.

That night was not very easy. It wasn’t nearly as difficult as when we had to do the same for our daughter, but it was difficult nonetheless.

As frustrating as it can be to help our kids take baby steps toward maturity, how much difficult is it for us?

My wife and I are currently medically unable to have another baby (you know–permanent birth control by choice), so with those pacifiers go the last vestiges of toddlerhood in our family. There are the occasional tantrums, but the symbol of that under three time period is gone.

We high-fived each other the next night because they went right to bed without any fuss. But then we nearly cried. No more babies in the house. Irrationally, of course, we went straight to, “It’s all braces, proms, and acne along with with attitude and hormones from here on.”

Obviously, we have some time before that stuff starts coming around. What we do have are fairly sentient beings who eagerly desire relationship with their parents and opportunities to push boundaries.

Our job? Love them, hang with them, and erect loving, safe, yet challenging, boundaries. I’ve been told that those years between 3-9 or so are when parents are still near-perfect and kids still cling to those two old people in their homes.

It’s during this time that deep, strong roots can grow. Traditions can start. Practicing healthy communication is vital. I can sit down and have a hilarious, yet surprisingly deep, discussion with any one of my three kids–and they’re all under 5.

I honestly wanted to take this post in a different direction… how we as adults have our own version of ‘pacifier’ that we’d do well to wrap up and send out in the mail. I’ll leave it at that–consider it a bonus if it’s helpful. I just know I couldn’t be too tough on the guys when they were fussy that first night. I’ve been there, and it hasn’t been that long ago.

Mostly, though, I realize I’m about to be on that wonderful time period where they’ll want family vacations and fun memories and fall festivals and Hot Wheels and playing pretend and a captive audience for their dance and singing shows.

Here’s to growing up! May we enjoy whatever the next small step might be.

 

 

 

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Break Room Snacks & The Challenge of Consistency

Posted on December 17, 2011 by Brett

One of the only consistent things in my life around the holidays is the steady stream of snacks into my company’s break room. We’re an insurance sales organization, so around now tins full of snacks parade through the door and onto our festive holiday tablecloth.

The problem with this snack kind of consistency is that it doesn’t help. I might gain 6 lbs without even noticing.

The problem with the good kind of consistency (the kind that breeds physical, parenting, spiritual, and vocational improvement) is that it can be difficult.

I recently posted about the challenge of inertia, that force that prevents us from getting started in the first place.  Usually, my struggle is with consistency… or inconsistency. My struggle is the traditional criticism of New Year’s Resolutions: I’m quick out of the gate, but about 1/4 mile down the track, I get distracted by something completely unrelated to the race I’m supposed to be running.

In short, consistency is a huge challenge to anything that is worth doing.

Do you want to lose weight? You have to eat well and exercise… consistently.

Do you want children that are relatively well-behaved and (mostly) joyful? You have to set boundaries and enforce them… consistently.

Do you want to develop a hobby? You have to turn off the tube and spend some time practicing… consistently.

Do you want to increase sales or open networking opportunities? You have to pick up the phone and make calls or find out where to network and go there…. consistently.

Why is it difficult? What’s the big problem? If we (a) know something is vital spiritually, relationally, financially, or physically then (b) shouldn’t it be a no-brainer to keep a habit and avoid anything that stands in the way?

If it’s the consistent, repetition of meaningful and productive tasks that creates change or produces results, why do we continually sabotage our own efforts?

A Few Ideas…

1.  Distraction: I get easily distracted. As a matter of fact, during this writing session, I checked Facebook, watched the Sanford and Son opening credits on YouTube, straightened my desk, and checked email about 4 times.

2. Delayed Gratification Doesn’t Feel Like Gratification: I’m reading a book by Darren Hardy called the Compound Effect. It talks about the small, consistent change that led to a guy losing 33 lbs over a 2 1/2 yr time period. That’s WAY too slow! More than likely, he saw nearly no change in the first 6 months. We want quick, fast results.

3.  We’re Comfy: I’ve felt that perhaps if I made the effort and succeeded, I wouldn’t know who that new guy was anymore. I mean, a Brett that doesn’t drop a McDonald’s sausage biscuit in 20 seconds? Who is that guy? We all have our go-to good-habit-breaking quick pleasure hits. If we decide to implement habits that remove those things, that’s unknown territory.

4.  Friends and Family: This one can work either way. If friendships or family relationships depend on activities or habits that destroy us, then that’s a tough cord to cut. If there’s more of a crab in a bucket mentality, that’s also a huge hurdle to overcome. (Go read it if you don’t know what I’m talking about).

Possible Ways to Improve…

1. Friends and Family: My wife totally blocked me from filling my travel mug with my 3rd through 5th cups of coffee this morning by brewing green tea and sneaking it in before I knew what hit me. Most of us have family and friends who can be a huge source of accountability, encouragement, and even co-sojourners. Tell someone what you want to do on a consistent basis and give them permission to keep you in check.

2. Simplicity: One of my downfalls is a tendency to over-complicate things. If I want to implement a new plan at work, it’ll have 5 Roman numerals, 4 bullets under each with a few in between.  I recently read this post about a simple approach to making life changes–an approach that doesn’t even involve goals.

Perhaps choosing one area to work on at a time is  just what the doctor ordered to begin developing consistency.

3. Clarity: Knowing why you want consistency in an area is vital.

4. Clarity, take 2: A plan is vital. If you want to become a jogger but wake up without a route and running shoes, then you’ll hit snooze and wake up later and eat a pop-tart.

A simple, clear plan is best. For me, right now, I’m committing to reading the Bible, praying, and journaling for the first 25 minutes I’m awake. I set a timer and don’t do anything else (except drink coffee) until I’m done. It’s working pretty good right now.

5. Machete Choppin’: If you’re having a hard time making it through the jungle, then it’s time to start cutting stuff out. You know the things in your life that are a hindrance. So do I. It’s so much easier to say than do, but we best get to chopping.

In the end, the challenge to consistency is comfort and an occasional circumstance. The solution for me is to muster the ‘Why’, small victories, encouragement, and a relentless weed-pulling mindset.

What about you?

  • How do you maintain good habits?
  • How do you start and continue?
  • What have you had to yank out of your world and get rid of so you could pursue something that was much more worthwhile?

 

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